TX Day 7/ NM Day 0 - Buddy Holly, Buried Cars, and Big Blue Holes
My day of saying goodbye to Texas sadly had to start with saying goodbye to Mattie. I was sad to have to say goodbye to my friend, but I had another day of 7+ hours of driving if I was to make an open mic in Albuquerque later tonight so I had to set out bright and early. Even if it was brief, it's always great to break up the lonely road with a familiar face, and we had time to snap a quick selfie before I left. You can tell by the fact that we both look pretty good and happy .that Mattie took the photo. I do look like I could use a haircut and a coffee though.
I didn't have time for the haircut, but I did caffeinate myself at Gold Stripe Coffee in Lubbock, TX. The name Lubbock was familiar to me from country songs and western movies, but I didn't actually know much about the town itself. It was a little less than two hours north of Midland, so after driving barely awake on dusty highways, imagine my pleasant surprise to drive up to a bustling little college town. Texas Tech is in Lubbock and I think that, combined with some famous residents and energy companies, has made it the economic and cultural center of that entire region of Northwest Texas. And where there's college students, there's always at least one good coffee shop and Gold Stripe delivered. It was a very hip and cozy spot, and the barista was one of the friendliest guys I've met. He got really excited when I asked him for a joke and started telling me all about the local comedy scene that some local college students have been trying to kickstart. It felt good to really be awake again, and to have this nice little bit of human connection that I was not at all expecting after those first two hours of open road. I was having such a nice time there, I almost forgot that I had to get a move on because there was still a lot of ground to cover.
I did take some time to do some quick sight seeing around Lubbock, because I had to. Lubbock is the hometown of the one and only Buddy Holly, the man who made nerds everywhere feel like they could become rock and roll stars. You don't grow up with a folk singing dad without learning to love and play a handful of Buddy's songs, so while I didn't have time to see the Buddy Holly House Museum, I did make sure to see his statue. The statue as well as a West Texas Hall of Fame Wall is situated in a park between Buddy Holly Ave. and Crickets Ave. which is super cute. The Hall of Fame had some pretty big names besides just Buddy including his former bassist, Waylon Jennings. There's a story that when Buddy and the band were getting on the fateful plane ride that would end it all, the manager who was going to drive the tour bus had a cold and the bus didn't have heat so Waylon offered to trade his spot on the plane so he wouldn't get more sick. Buddy jokingly said to him, "I hope you freeze to death on that bus" to which Waylon replied, "I hope your plane crashes" and those were the last words he ever said to his friend! I don't know if it's totally true or if it's become a bit embellished over time, but it's kinda spooky. My dad actually first told me that story, but I also heard it on the newest show by Mike Judge (one of my favorite comedy guys and Texas guys) called Tales from the Tour Bus which I cannot recommend enough even if you absolutely hate country music (I always thought I was in that camp until I watched this show so it's that good).
The other big Lubbock sight I wanted to see before heading out was the Windmill Collection at the American Wind Power Center. The center features the personal collection of a windmill restoration expert who started collecting in the 60s, and by the 90s he had over 160 windmills ranging from very beautiful old fashioned Dutch style mills to sleek modern turbines. Unfortunately the center was closed, because most places are closed on Sundays in Texas because Jesus. Luckily though windmills aren't exactly something you can hide, so you can still get a pretty good look at some collection highlights from the street.
After the windmills, I drove another hour and a half to the next big cultural center of Northwest Texas: Amarillo. Amarillo is home to one of the most famous roadside attractions in all of Americana and the namesake of a pretty solid Springsteen song, Cadillac Ranch, so that was my first destination. The ranch was conceived of by an underground art movement called Ant Farm and funded by eccentric millionaire (and also sadly a big creep) Stanley Marsh 3, who was a big supporter of playful and ridiculous art around Amarillo. The artists wanted to make a roadside attraction that toyed with one of the most classic symbols of the American road, so they took 10 classic Cadillacs made from 1949 to 1963 (the era of sweet tail fins) and buried them nose first in the dirt at an angle that they claim corresponds to the angle of the Great Pyramid of Giza, though that might just be an exaggeration in keeping with the silliness at the heart of the endeavor. If you're more of a car person than I am, don't worry they used used or junk cars so they didn't just destroy 10 perfectly good Caddies. I loved the ranch, and I couldn't have asked for a better day to see it. Ten buried cars would have been a striking and surprising image no matter what, but getting to see cutting across a big blue sky was really spectacular. Also in keeping with the playfullness of the piece, the artists intentionally left the piece open to the public to interact with, and it's a bit of a tradition for visitors to take spray cans and leave their personal mark. It makes the cars as bright and crazy up close as they look from a distance, but it also means the place positively stinks of spray paint which I could have done without. I think if it wasn't such a perfect day, there would have probably been less visitors and thus less spray paint smell, but honestly it was totally worth it for that view. I love some good whimsy.
One more monumental piece of goofiness, also funded by the same crazy rich guy, not too far from the ranch was a sculpture called Ozymandias On the Plains by the incredibly named artist Lightnin' McDuff. The piece is accompanied with a plaque that explains that when the poet Percy Shelley was crossing the dessert on horseback in 1819 he came across these legs, ruins of a giant statue of King Ramses II, which inspired him to right his masterpiece, Ozymandias, particularly the line "I met a traveller from an antique land Who said: Two vast and trunkless legs of stone Stand in the desert… And on the pedestal these words appear: ‘My name is Ozymandias, King of Kings, Look on my works, ye mighty, and despair!’". The plaque also goes on to explain that the reason the only the legs remain is that some sore losers from that rival town Lubbock destroyed it after Amarillo beat them in football, slyly tipping the reader off that the whole story is a bunch of baloney (though the gym socks should have been a big hint). I'm pretty sure Shelley never went to America let alone West Texas, but I like that the casual sightseer might not think twice about what looks like a super official old plaque. Nobody said art couldn't also be a prank.
After all that big art, I had a pretty big appetite going, so I got some lunch at a nice local Mexican restaurant called El Braceros Mexican Grill. I got two soft carnitas tacos with rice, beans, and guac. It was also all drizzled in their signature special "green sauce", whichI'll be honest I was skeptical about because that is not a super appetizing shade of green. The waitress talked it up so much though that I had to do it, and it tasted a hell of a lot better than it looked with lots of flavor but not a whole ton of heat which my delicate Irish palette appreciated. Everything was delicious, even though I'm surprised I had any room for it after all the amazing free homemade chips and salsa before the meal. It just kept coming. The carnitas inside the tacos was tender and juicy, and the rice and beans added a lot. There's something about authentic Mexican rice and beans close to the border that makes me feel like I never actually had rice and beans before now. I had no idea what I was missing!
With a big full belly, I bid Texas a fond farewell and crossed into the most recent Mexico. I actually made pretty good time, so I was able to make one more quick pit stop along the way to Breaking Bad country. I took a little detour off of historic Route 66 to see the Santa Rosa Blue Hole, largely because I thought it was very funnily blunt name. The hole did live up that bluntness as it was a big blue, but somehow I was still impressed with just how blue it was. The hole is a natural pool, and the crystal clear waters actually let you see a little bit into the deep network of underground caves that give the pool surprising depth. Entrance to the caves are covered in a grate, because two scuba divers got lost and drowned down there in the 70s. Only as of 2013 have scientists finally pushed back that grate to try to start mapping out the cave system, so as of now we don't actually know just how deep it goes, but it does sort of prove the expression still blue holes run deep.
When I finally made it to Albuquerque, I actually made it to the brewery where the mic would be with enough time to walk and get some more coffee, which was very welcome both for the caffeine and the opportunity to move my legs after sitting in car for so long. I went to a hip sci-fi themed place called Deep Space Coffee. The decor was very cool, but the coffee wasn't really space themed which was just a teensy bit disappointing. It was very good however so I guess that makes up for it.
The open mic was in a small microbrewery called Boese Brothers Brewery. They had a really laid back homey vibe, and you could tell by the fact that it was filled people just hanging out on Sunday mid-afternoon that it was local favorite. I got a flight of their amber, their wheat beer, their lager, and their cherry-wood porter, which unsurprisingly was my favorite. The others totally held their own though with the amber actually coming in as a close second.
While I was drinking I ended up meeting and chatting with another out of town comic, named Patrick Harrison. He was from the East Coast too, but he was in the military and started doing comedy around San Antonio and sorted of bopped around between different scenes depending on where he was stationed. He had just gotten back from doing some shows in Salt Lake City, and he gave me some really nice recommendations for when I eventually made it up that way. It was nice meeting another traveler, and we sat, drank, and shared stories until the mic started which really kicked things off on a very warm and pleasant note.
The mic itself was excellent, with a surprising turnout of both comics and audience for a Sunday night. All the comics were really strong, and there was a real supportive vibe the whole night. One table of audience members got a little too drunk, and kind of heckled from time to time but even that was basically pleasant and harmless.
My favorite comic of the night was a retired children's book author in her 70s Carolyn Meyer, who did one of the funniest and most surprisingly filthy sets I've seen so far. Age clearly is nothing but a number to her, and her writing experience really shines through elevating the material far above the shock value of hearing a sweet older person be dirty. The material was razor sharp. My favorite line was "I got a vibrator, and it's a pretty good ride but there's just no communication"
Other highlights:
Royal Wood- Everything's better if you add Academy Award winner before your name. Like "Academy Award winner Royal Wood... you have cancer"
Julian Brooks - Everyone needs to chill out. Especially Nature. Wasps kill things, that's a jerk move
Marty Adam Smith - I liked God's earlier stuff better. Reality is just his sophomore slump.
Kaatje Gotcha- I have been to every pre-gentrified area in the country. If there wasn't a Starbucks, I was there.
Patrick Harrison - I went to Salt Lake City, which is like the Vatican for gullible white people
Jaya Daniels- I dropped my phone in the toilet while googling water proof cases.
I think my own set went pretty well. I was feeling a little silly, possibly because of the beer, so I sort of winged it more than usual, but I think it worked and I had a fun being on stage which is always nice nearly 100 times in at this point. I had a fun moment where, because I went on before her, I didn't know Carolyn was a dirty comic, and made the mistake of assuming that she was a sweet mom or grandma there to support someone, so I got flustered when I told a dirty joke about pornography and then made eye contact with her in the very front row. I apologized, but she just laughed and gave me a thumbs up which cracked me up and caused me to ad lib, "Me and her, we watch the same porn" which was unintentionally much funnier to all the other comics who knew that she had heard and would go on to say much much worse. After her set, she came up to me and said "See you didn't need to apologize to me, bet you didn't see that coming" and we both laughed and chatted for a bit. It was a good lesson in not judging a book by it's cover and a very fond memory from a really fun mic. Not a bad way to start New Mexico.
Favorite Random Sightings: Cow Containers (not sure if it's a brand of container or a type of container, but I feel like the latter would have to be pretty big); Toot 'n Totem (no clue); an actual camel just in somebody's back yard; Meat Lunch (simple yet elegant)
Regional Observations: On the border going from north Texas to New Mexico, there is the most gigantic stretch of windmills I have ever seen. I know the Kennedy's think they're ugly, but I like how they look, and it always makes me happy to see that empty space put to good use.
Albums Listened To: The Reggae Will Not Be Televised by Crazy Baldhead Soundsystem; Rehearsals by the Slackers (can you tell I got in too deep to my fandom of them); Rejuvenation by the Meters; Remain In Light by The Talking Heads (this is right about where they start getting too synth-y for me, but I like the world influence. It's a mixed bag); Remember That I Love You by Kimya Dawson; Renegades by Rage Against the Machine (it's a covers album so I don't hate it); Return of Saturen by No Doubt (just Bathwater); Return of the Aquabats by the Aquabats (a very funny name for a debut album); Return of the Son of... by Dweezil Zappa; The Revival Tour 2011 Collections by Brian Fallon
People's Favorite Jokes:
What did the buffalo say to his son on the first day of school? Bison
Texas Superlatives:
Favorite Coffee: Best all around- The Brew Junkie Coffee House in Roanoke; Best Pure Taste- Sweet Eugene's House of Java in College Station
Favorite Food: Freedmen's BBQ in Austin or the Original Blanco Cafe in San Antonio
Favorite Chain: Torchy's Tacos
Favorite Beer: The Caucasian White Russian Stout by Texas Ale Project
Favorite Attraction: I have to go with the LBJ Library but Barney Smith's Toilet Seat Art Museum is real high on the list
General Impressions of the Comedy Scene: Too big to really be one scene, so it's hard to say if there were any tendencies in the comedy since each major city had its own little flavor. From what little I saw of each city's comedy, the comics were all pretty supportive even when the crowds weren't, and I hear that when there isn't a big giant festival going on Austin is a must do comedy spot even if it was a little quiet while I was there.
Songs of the Day:
The definitive version of the song as far as I am concerned
what a bunch of goofs
And of course: